I understand why you may believe that, and if you are comparing natural hair to relaxed hair, it’s the obvious way to describe it right?
OK, fine. But let me share something with you. This is the twenty-first century, not 1955.
Advanced products and access to fabulous tutorials on sites like YouTube have revolutionized styling, perceptions, maintenance and the manageability of natural hair.
Yes, it is now possible to do lower-maintenance, wash-and-go styles that don’t necessarily involve wearing an afro, and the hot-comb-on-the-stove with heavy grease method is not the only alternative to an afro.
You can wear twists, braids, twist outs, braid outs, puffs, pin-ups and the list goes on.
Plus, if you haven’t managed/styled your natural hair in 20 years (or ever) how do you really know your hair is unmanageable?
My Story
In 2007, my relaxer damage started. I kept trying to repair my hair with products, only to follow up with another relaxer that reversed any fixes I made weeks before. This lasted for 3 years. Then I started to question why I never considered going natural since my hair was clearly not liking these chemicals anymore.
I began throwing around the “unamanageable” word in reference to my natural hair, but I started to realize I had no real experience with my hair outside of relaxing.
I got my first relaxer at age 8, so why was I assuming such a thing when I had no reference point? Because my texture wasn’t shiny and curly? And if my hair was so unmanageable, why couldn’t I just learn to manage it?
In any event, I was tired of damage and my temporary bandaid-approach to solving my hair issues. So I decided to start transitioning to natural hair.
Two months into my transition, I saw no evidence that my hair could be managed. My fears were confirmed. My tresses were brillo-pad dry, brittle, breaking even more than when I was relaxing and I wondered if I had the “right kind of hair” to go natural.
But for some reason, I never gave up (I think I was just fed up with chemical damage.) I kept deep conditioning my hair weekly and I stayed away from direct heat.
I Can See The Light!
By the end of my 3rd month something started to happen. My new growth began softening up. I even noticed a few coils and spirals coming out of my scalp. Spring curls? In my dry, fuzzy hair? Who would have thought????
I also noticed that my hair didn’t tangle as easily as it did when I first started transitioning. Managing my hair was starting to get a little easier.
I’m now 7 months into my natural hair transition. I have almost 4 inches of new growth yet my hair is actually getting easier to manage? How could this be? If natural hair is so unmanageable then how come it’s getting easier with more length?
Easy answer…
Knowledge and patience. Once you learn what your hair likes and needs, you will find that it becomes easier to take care of it. Now, that doesn’t mean it won’t take you longer to style or wash your hair, but you can still learn to manage it.
I Challenge Your Beliefs
Instead of saying your hair is unmanageable, how about saying you haven’t really learned how to take care of it.
I have friends who are natural, their hair is twice my thickness, triple the length, and I doubt any of them would describe their hair as unmanageable.
Time consuming to style? Maybe. Unmanageable? I think that word is relative to your commitment and experience.
It does take me longer to style my hair, but the rewards outweigh the work involved. My hair is healthier than it’s been in a long time.
Want manageable hair? Deep conditioning weekly (I use Organics Olive Oil Root Stimulator) and using good leave-in conditioners will help with detangling and minimizing frizz. You will be surprised at how your behaves when you learn to properly take care of it.
Seven months into my transition, I never thought I’d be able to go this long without a relaxer and be able to maintain my hair.
If your belief about the manageability of natural hair is based on lack of experience with your own hair, just remember you can learn how to manage it just like you learned how to manage and style your relaxed hair.
And if you don’t want to learn, there are probably many stylists in your city who specialize in caring for natural hair. 😉
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Having said all the above, I realize natural hair is not for everybody. You have to be mentally prepared to make this transition and not everyone wants to learn how to manage or style their hair.
Just please don’t make assumptions based out of fear and lack of experience with your own hair. Natural is manageable if you take the time to learn how.
Hello and thank you in advance. I am 6 mos. into transitioning. I am struggling with this stuff. I shampoo wkly. I usually deep condition wkly as well. However since tangling and the darn dryness brittle coarse dryness I get before I can even LOC the stuff aka my nappy ugly hair. I have tried everything. Moisturizing is my enemy, please any tips/suggestions anything would be great. P.S. I have become a product junkie, I have I believe everything product there is, in stores and products I’ve ordered online from different people on instagram.
Thank you
.Robin Marshall
I think that’s a normal thing when you start. I was that way too. I even bought products for natural hair when I was only 2 months into my transition. lol
Are you getting tangling when you shampoo or when it’s dry? I never manipulated my hair after 3 months unless I was shampooing it. I would always leave it in a rod set so I wouldn’t have to touch it.
I want to go natural. Truth is i am scared and i feel like i dont have time to manage my hair. But i have been trying some of the same remedies on my perm hair and has found that a lot of it is working well. My problem i still want to ho natural but dont know if i will look horrible and i dont want to do like some people n put an s curl in my hair n lie n tell people i am natural. Can u give me any suggestions on how to start?
Hi Kisha,
To be honest, being natural is about having confidence in yourself. Don’t worry about learning to manage your hair because you will learn. I was NEVER one to do my hair but I learned thanks to YouTube. You can too. The rest is up to being confident. Yes, you will have to get used to your new look and so will your friends and family but I bet you will grow to like it.
Start by wearing your hair in rod sets with small perm rods to get yourself used to the curly look. Those styles last long and will resemble a natural style. It will also give you practice on setting your hair. You can do it!
Hi I just recently took out my dreads, which I had for 7 years. My hair is really damaged, dry, and it is falling out now. Also, whenever i wash my hair and wait for it to dry, it coils up and i can barely comb out my hair without pulling out half of it. How do I repair my hair and make it more manageable?
Also…I’m really tender headed. Thank you!
Hi Lisa, it’s been 7 months since my last relaxer, now I decided I wanted to go natural because honestly I was only getting them to keep that “straight” look. My hair is wavy type (I’m not sure if that makes sense) but I wanted to know what leave-in conditioner do you recommended for ladies who are deciding to transition instead of the big chop. I been really skeptical of products and I’m worried I choose a kind that could break my hair off. Please help, I’m new this but I’m determine to embrace the hair I born with (in a healthier more way). Thank you, I truly would appreciate it.
Hi,i sent a post back in may,i havent seen a,lot of new growth like most people i have read that are natural,i am really getting frustrated bcuz i send messages to all tgese women wirh blogs and no replies back,just want sum good advice on products,styles,and how to grow out my perm and see some length. Thx
Hi lisa. I’ve been natural for about a year and a half since november 2011. I have no clue what to do with my hair even though it has grown all I do is wear it in a fro or wash n go’s but my hair is getting longer and I’m starting not to like the look of a simple wash n go. Its really frustrating I’m almost to the point where I just want to give up on it and go back to my relaxers
Hi Nitra
Don’t give up girl! Do you ever do twist outs? That’s my go-to style now. Or you can put your hair in small twists which will give you a style that will last awhile.
Hi,i have been reading all about natural hair,i havent permed my hair in over 6 minths but i dont see much growth,i dont deep condition,u wear my hair up. I use black Jamaican oil. Need more advice please help. I see all the curls after i shampoo my hair.
Hi. I’m a mixed girl, but my hair isn’t that curly. My sister has beautiful wringlet curls, but my hair is frizzy, wavy, curly, and straight at the same time. I always just straighten it, which makes it worse. How do I fix my hair so I can wear I natural??!
Hi. I’ve been natural since the end of 2007 and my hair is nice and THICK!!! I have a moderate amount of length, but never can see it due to my hair curling up so tight. I do a deep condition, and i also protect my hair from the elemnts by getting sew ins every now and then or braids, but at the end of the day, my hair and scalp are as dry as Death Valley! It gets so bad that my scalp even breaks out! my question is what is the best option to a) thin my hair out so it can grow and b) stimulate and moisturize my scalp to where it’s not always breaking out.. Any and all suggestions(besides cutting or perming!) are appreciated!
Hi Shanda
What products to do you use to moisturize? Also do you ever deep condition your hair? Sounds to me like your hair just needs to find a good moisturizing regimen.
Hi Lisa! I use Dr. Miracle’s products. I also do a deep condition with regular mayonnaise as well. But for some reason, some of his products actually irritate my scalp. I’ve just recently gone out and bought tea tree oil, jojoba oil and i mix it with olive oil. I have yet to see any noticeable results, but will keep you informed. Feel free to offer any suggestions.Thank you again!
Hi Shanda
I rarely hear this product as a recommendation for natural or transitioners. Have you tried the Shea Moisture line? You can buy it at Walgreens or Target.
Funny thing is I was just looking at that line of care in the store today!! I was just wondering if that’s a good line to use.. I’m going to try it! Thanks so much!!!
Hi I cut all my relaxed and damaged hair off, down to the roots. I wore lace front wigs while trying to wait for my new hair to grow. The constant wig applications caused my hairline to completely go bald, they are now trying to grow back but in 2 months I only see peach fuzz. In the meantime the rest of my hair is much thinner than it was when I wore relaxers and is so brittle, dry and lifeless. What should I be doing to remedy all these problems? Non existing hairline, dry brittle and life less hair. Please help, give me suggestions on exactly which hair products I should try using as there are thousands to choose from.
Hi Roxy
Try Jamaican Black Castor Oil for your edges. As far as moisturizing, get some Shea Moisture from Walgreens or Target. Spritz your hair with water and then add the Shea Moisture. Then seal the moisture in with olive oil or some kind of natural oil. That will keep your hair from being brittle.
im in my 10th month of transitioning and i am ready to cut these horrible permed ends off!!!! i have learned to manage my natural hair pretty well but i am still having a problem with keeping it soft. what products do you suggest for conditioning and maintaining the health of my natural hair. and how often do you recomend i condition my hair. ill take all the advice you have to give…THANKS
p.s do you use any curl enhancers?
Have you tried a hot oil treatment yet? You can use any oils you want. I use olive oil and vitamin E. Warm the oils by sitting a bottle in a pan of hot water (don’t use the microwave ’cause you’ll lose the nutrients.) I would try to deep condition once a week if you can.
Despite all the “positive” words in your article and the responses, they’re all pretty much contradictory to your “essay”. Natural hair (African textured) IS UNMANAGEABLE!!! From reading all these time consuming and complex methods of caring for it proves my point…
Hey Pat, I appreciate your perspective, but I don’t find it unmanageable, just a lot more work and time. I think there’s a difference. Unmanageable implies it’s impossible to manage. I don’t feel that way at all. I think for those who accept that natural hair is going to take more time (which I have) then that’s just one thing you learn to deal with when it comes to having natural hair. It’s been worth it for me but I understand not everyone can get down with it.
Hi I haven’t had a perm in five years but I wear sewin weaves. I’ve tried to wear my hair out but is frizzy and soft I just don’t know where to start at and on top of when I do my hair by the next day its sweated out because I sweat bad all year long.
i have been in transition for almost five months. i did cut some of the relaxer due to breakage and split ends. my hair is soft but that doesnt help any.i have really spent a lot of money trying to find the right products for my hair but i have had no luck.i am tired of walking around with my hair looking like i dont care about my appearance. can you please give me some inexpensive ideas to help manage and grow my hair thanks a lot
Hi Lisa!
Okay again I am post relaxer almost 6 months in and I have SO MUCH LENGTH of new growth!! It’s unbelievable! I have recently taken down my Senegalese twist and just like my micro braids, all the shedding hair and broken hair came out when I washed it. I am using Carol’s Daughter 1-2-3 Transitioning Kit with Olive Infusion. It was wonderful the first wash!! It’s only been three days but my hair is soo much softer than any other time. But the problem is, I don’t know what to do with it. I tried two strand twist and when I had untwisted them, the came out really ugly! The flat twist came out strangely..strange. The fact I still have about three inches of relaxed hair doesn’t make them look better. My true new growth isn’t that long and between my natural and the relaxed is a strange texture that’s from a blow out I had a few months ago. I guess my question is: what styles can I do for these three different textures? I’m a very impatient person but I’m truly trying with my natural journey. What can I do?
My first successful transitioning style was the rod set. Have you tried that?
i am trying the transitioning thing my daughters and myself one is 18 and the other is 8 yrs old now what i want to know is do we need to cut the relaxer out.?
Hi Latonya. I was able to complete my transition without cutting my hair. It is a journey to say the least but doable. See this post. https://napturallycurly.com/2011/09/im-all-natural-no-big-chop/
I’ve been transitioning for about 4 months. The back of my hair seems to always get dry faster. Do you have any advice on what I should do? I wear braid outs alot because I like the coily look and the back is fine the first day but after that it just looks frizzy and dry. I wash and deep condition every time I braid it because I like to braid it wet. Any suggestions?
Hi Monte
Most people have different textures on their head. My back is also more coily/wavy but frizzes a day or two later. That’s just our texture so I’ve just learned to live with it. Products will define, minimize frizz to a point, but ultimately your hair wants to frizz so that’s what it will do.
Aloe Vera can help with taming frizz so you might want to try adding some aloe vera gel to your hair when braiding it.
So I decided I want to go natural after a really bad quick weave. I don’t want to cut my little hair That I have left, but I find it hard to do anything with it. Its very short but relaxed and I don’t want to add any heat do you have any suggestions. I would also like to add I’m a freshman in college with not alot of time on my hands. Thanks in advance
thanku . ur website and youtube has helped me alot. b4 i was so ignorant about natural hair and i thought i would never ever go natural . now i cant wait 😀 . thank you so much . now i have a clue about how to stop my heavy breakage nd dry hair . happy holidays
I am loving my natural hair but it sames dry alot and not as soft as I want it to be what do you think is good for very dry coarse hair.
Have you ever tried castor oil or sleeping in a plastic cap overnight? The moisture from your body heat and cap can help soften your hair. Some people even lightly mist their hair before covering it with a cap.
Hello Lisa
I decided to go natural May 2011. That was my last perm. My hair is ridiculously hard to detangle with the two textures. I tries Knot Today and I didn’t get good results. I am just learning to do deep condition and practice doing flat twists. Would you recommend the Cantu line? Its fairly affordable but I am just not sure what to start with. I just recently started taking care of my transitioning hair.
Hi Layna
I don’t like the Canutu line. Didn’t seem to do anything to my hair but some people swear by it! So you have to see if it works for you. Have you read my article on detangling?
https://napturallycurly.com/transitioning-from-relaxed-to-natural-hair/how-to-detangle-transitioning-and-natural-hair/
Hi Jasmin,
I am ready to go natural. I am at the 12 week no perm stage and my hair is snap, crakling and poping. I am trying to stay strong. I cannot wear the up do’s as my edges are almost bald. Whenever I did wear and up do I would pencil in my edges. Any suggestions.
hi
i m in transition hair, my hair is wavy curly is a mixing of both,,, the problem is in ths transition cuz my hair is very dry and is flat in the ends but have a big volume in the medium and roots parts. im very angry. the queston is what natural remedy is good for my problem
Do you deep condition your hair?
hello,
my name is amirah. im 18 and i decided to go natural because i was tired of the chemicals. today i noticed that my hair has broken off and it has sort of depressed me. I feel like my hair too thick and im on the verge of giving up. do you have any advice?
Hi Amirah
Do you deep condition your hair at all? I use Organics Olive Oil Replenisher (buy at any beauty supply). Do this once/week for a couple of months and also get a good trim to see if that helps. Do you use a lot of heat? Try wearing wraps, rod sets, twist outs or pin ups to keep from having to manipulate your hair and/or use heat.
Hi Lisa,
I am in transition, I have not had a relaxer for 9 1/2 months, Im trying not to cut the remainder of the relaxed hair…lol but Im so anxious to finally wear my hair in its all natural state. I have kinky twists now and they have been up for almost two months, any ideas?
Hi Jasmin,
Have you tried doing any twist outs? I just did my first puff with a twist out and I am loving this low maintenance style.
https://napturallycurly.com/2011/02/my-first-transitioning-puff/
It lasts too!